Qi Pan Shan

On Saturday morning my good friend Lauren came over at 7 a.m. (yes on a Saturday!) and helped me pack up my pregnant self, two kids, a pack n play, and my luggage. We then hopped in a taxi and headed to the bus to take us to Qi Pan Shan. I have heard alot about Qi Pan Shan and the best I can describe it is a resort in/near the mountains. We had a local Women's Retreat there this past weekend. Nathan left on Wednesday for training in Tianjin so while he was gone I decided to go to this since it was good to get away and childcare was provided. We arrived at this beautiful place with SO much water! The weather was cool and felt like fall. All in all, it was a good time. I am SO GRATEFUL for Lauren and all the help she offered, even being my room mate. I also learned this weekend just how much help I do need taking care of these kiddos. I often take my hubby for granted and was reminded and humbled by my need to say "Help!" - often! I'm sure many women did not come to help me but I am grateful that even many who were there to get away from their kiddos were willing to help me with mine. It was a good time of relaxing and interacting with women that I don't see very often and new friends.

Overall I had a good time but the night was awful! My husband always tells me that hotels are a bad idea for our two kiddos together and like the stubborn woman I am I did not listen and learned the hard way. When will I learn my husband is always right in these areas?!? Maddy screamed during nap since her nap time was delayed by 1 1/2 hours. I did get to nap when she finally fell asleep. She was bombarded by chinese workers ALWAYS wanting to hold her and play with her which was sometimes helpful but often more stressful cause then I had to keep an extra eye on where these strangers were taking my baby off to. For bedtime Maddy slept in her pack n play in the bathroom - which went well - and Jachin had to sleep with me. I was very hopeful when he fell asleep before bed time but when I went to get him after the last session they quickly informed me that my little burst of energy awoke shortly after being dropped off. I was asked by one woman if Jachin ever sleeps, jokingly of course, and to her I responded in all honesty, "Not if he can help it." Jachin, because he didn't have a mommy to teach him how to sleep when he was a baby, is unable to really calm his limbs enough to sleep. I am amazed he doesn't pass out from exhaustion daily but if you want him to go to sleep he looks at you, locks the jaw, and kicks and squirms as hard as possible. He needs a swaddler but now that he is almost 3 it is too late for that and I hope one day Jachin will learn to sleep well.

To illustrate this better here is how our night went:

I put Jachin in the bed with me because I didn't have a crib, if he is in a bed he will fall out, and if he is loose he will get into EVERYTHING. I knew this was a horrible idea but I had no other choice. I put him in the bed with me and had to wrap my leg around him to keep him from squirming out of the bed and within 10 minutes he was passed out and snoring. After this I went to sleep and we did well until his hourly transitions into REM sleep. Every hour he would move and not normal shuffling but flailing legs, hands, arms and head in a 360 degree circle. This translates that Mommy was kicked in the head and slapped in the face many times last night. I either laid with my back to him or facing him and hands guarding my face. Note - if we had a king size bed it may be a little smoother but we had like a twin so it was tricky. Needless to say I go very little sleep. Jachin fell out of bed at 3 so the whole process began anew - settling him to get him to sleep. And then Maddy woke up at 5, talking to herself.

I learned why women go on retreats WITHOUT their small children. So if I return to another of these women's retreats I will be sure to leave the kids at home or not come. I did have some positive times:

1. Learned Lauren is super sacrificial and loving even more than I ever imagined :-)

2. Was SUPER GRATEFUL to get home and be with my hubby

3. Two days of bad naps means early bed time tonight and more quality time with my hubby

4. Good time with fellow like minded sisters who I don't get to see often

5. Taking a walk by the lake

6. Being reminded by a woman who has run this race longer than me that my failures and faults are ways to see my great need for grace. I was encouraged!